Sun’s Grace

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One of these days

When you walk down a road

Hand in hand with a new person

Making all those whimsical promises

You once showered me with

I want you to bask in your selfishness

And cruelty

And take a step back, literally.

And run back

Run back till the time you don’t find a mirror

And when you do,

Take a lasting, deep look

For as long as you can manage

As long as you stop admiring the way your hair look

And just when you do, look into your eyes

Which stare back at you intently

And ask yourself

How could you live all these years with yourself

When you made over a dozen people question their existence

How can you sleep at night

When you snatched away people’s will to dream

The endless nightmares that end in your name

This realisation won’t come in a day,

It will take you days and months or maybe years

To get past the atrocities you’ve put us,

Me through.

You’ve become a subject of poetry and prose for me

A person with whom I compare my agony with

When you are making a promise again

Holding hands, pretending to love and feel.

Have some grace for the ground you stand on

Let the wind jostle you up, let the rain wash over you

Like holy water on Satan.

May you soak in sun’s grace before it’s wrath burns you down.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Reflections and Shadows

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I reach out to you in the mirror 

You touch my hand and let out a sigh 

I let out a sigh too, only mine, fogs up the mirror. 

That’s real, isn’t it? 

But your deep searing stare is too real to be unreal too. 

I see you smile through your cracked lips and yellowed teeth, 

I smile right back, but mine shine, why? 

My red lips create the perfect seduction for a kiss, 

Yours are somewhat like a drug addict’s. 

Oh, have I offended you? Sorry my love. 

But, I really can’t seem to care more, you no doubt, are ugly. 

My earrings, diamond. 

Yours, can’t find’em. 

I am girl, girly enough in all the sense. 

You, wouldn’t even qualify for a tomboy. 

You want to hold back hands again, I oblige gently. 

You hold them too tight and crack my knuckles. 

Stop! It hurts, don’t pull me towards you. 

Your forehead is trickling with blood, wipe it! 

You smear it all across your face,  

But why are you ruining mine! 

Please stop pulling me towards yourself, it hurts. 

I’ll paint my face tonight, I want to be different than you all. 

The mirror shatters 

So do you 

But your force has left me wailing on the floor. 

Cut and bruised I look at myself. 

The pieces of the mirror is what is all left. 

The Unnoticed Window

Hi

I am

Nobody in general. Honestly.

I am the person you’d walk by and wouldn’t take notice of. I am like the window masked by the tree with many branches with beautiful blossoming leaves on every branch alike.

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It’s not like I am an antisocial element in a world buzzing of social entities. No.

I am just the person who won’t confirm to your notions. I am not regular. And it’s not as poetic and beautiful as people make it sound.

It’s hard. Deciding to try and not to try. If try, for how long. If not, why the hell not.

It meddles with me every time I wake up and decide to be a participant in the world again. I want to be like the people I see. The people pulling off a smile so flawlessly and not looking like a panzee when in a laughing riot.

I take up mannerisms so very quickly and forget what and who I am.

I am the window who you could paint in any color. The window which is easily modified and no matter how beautifully you line it with lights and flowers, it’ll always be the house people go praising.

You’ll walk up to me when it rains. You’ll look right through me and smile. You won’t see that I am bracing the drops. And when it’s bright and sunny, you’ll cover me with curtains. And then, just like that, I’ll be in-existent again. Like always.

I’ll wait around again trying to be more fitting, trying to be a window. A window you’ll realize is a person just as you are with all the emotions and insecurities just like yours. But where we’ll differ, is, I won’t have a window ever. And you’ll always be the tree with the pink flowers.