Hi, it’s me.
Your sidekick, your best friend, your partner in crime.
I committed a crime.
Which you know nothing of.
I fell in love with you.
11 September 2014.
We talked about how silly our teachers were to think we would actually submit a project just two days after she gave it to us.
We laughed and walked together to the canteen and had a coffee.
Hot September day and we sipped coffee when everyone bought their ice creams.
We talked till the last class ended.
All the atrocities of this stupid world.
How everyone was oblivious of the simplest pleasures of living.
The project day turned into a meaningful conversation between two distinct ice cream eaters.
Me and you, we came to be called friends.
We sat together, laughed together, created and resolved drama together.
An inseparable team of notorious 11th graders, me and you.
Soon, I realized I was in trouble.
18th September 2014.
Maybe the shortest time in all of human history to fall in love.
Fall in love with all of the person. His fears, his dreams, his nightmares, his habits, his weaknesses.
I fell hard.
I wanted to tell you that you were the person I wanted my every project to be with.
You were the one loved so damn hard.
19th September 2014.
My heart was in smithereens.
It was cut through in a zig zag fashion, which would look like art to some, but it was battered to pieces.
You told me about how much you miss the girl you once loved.
It was her birthday. You wanted to remind her of your love.
Your love, which you’d scream to the world at 3:47 am.
And at 6:15 pm, there I was.
Putting up a heart together in your bedroom,
Writing your outpour onto a perfect replica of my heart before this day.
21st September 2014
“She loved it, oh she loved it, she blushed so hard, she gave me a hug….”
How could I have ever told you that I sobbed silently over the phone when you danced on your bed, practically on the top of the world.
How could I ruin your beautiful day, just so I could laugh.
I broke further. I wanted to rush into your arms and tell you how much I wanted you to hold me against you.
The sobs choked my voice but I listened to every word you said. All you had to say.
We both didn’t sleep that night.
You got a piece back. Me? I lost another.
11th October 2014
After a collective festival vacation, we all returned to school.
I sat amongst the large group we had, but I wasn’t there.
I was still stuck at the night.
You sat right in front of me, giving me the eye whenever something came up with a minute reference to our personal jokes.
Could you look through me then?
How could you though, you saw through someone else.
21st November 2014.
The air couldn’t have been colder and it turned colder further.
She rejected your proposal three days back.
You hadn’t talked to me since then.
I wanted to just hold you let you sob and give all the love my broken heart still had.
But, you shut me off.
There isn’t a day to this moment that I don’t wish I’d just come over and hugged you and kissed you no matter how weird it would’ve gotten.
You’d have known, at least, that I had loved you throughout.
We grew apart, our banter at 3 am slowly started to end at 12, with some excuse or the other.
Slowly descending to twice a week talk or sometimes, not even that.
We just landed where we once began to grow.
Two distant project buddies.
Still sipping coffee, but alone, away, apart.